Perfecting Imperfection

I feel like I could relate to her decision, so much so, so much said that I had been wanting to say. Not that it's necessarily life changing, more along the lines of life tweaking, something small that makes a big difference.

I have a confession.

I have a scrapbook that I haven't started because I'm afraid that the pages won't be perfect. That I have to get better before I start. But how do I get better if I don't start? But what if I start and it's all wrong? What if I look back years from now and think of how crappy my scrapbook looks, picking out all of the flaws?
But what if I never start, and those memories are not recorded?
The issue here is that I need to start, and learn to accept the imperfections. One of the things that I enjoy most it to look back at pictures that were kept in albums. History recorded. The other day I was given an album from my aunt that had a picture of my parents when they were dating.

DATING.
Also, the album contained a picture of my dad's first car, and oh the stories it provoked from my mother about that first car.
A picture of my grandparent's wedding anniversary.
Showers thrown before my own parent's marriage.

Those are so precious to me. They are nowhere close to perfect. And in that, lies the secret. Someone was willing to splay out their imperfect record of day to day life. Of what mattered to them. And what was reflected to me, was the perfection of a imperfect world. A perfect gift. I'm not as concerned about giving future generations a gift, but to keep a record is something that is important to me. I get so much joy and realize so many blessings in being able to look back at the chronicle of my life so far. I don't live in a perfect world, so I should not expect that my pictures need to be edited before they are shared, my words don't need to be publishable before they are written, and my scrapbooking skills definitely do not need to be flawless before I have even started.

100.

She asked my dad to take a picture of us smiling at one another. I think it shows us enjoying one another.

Eyes that have yet to see even one full year looking into the eyes that have seen 1oo.

She is 100. 100 years here. 100 years of life.

Moments.
Relationships.
Struggles.
Triumphs.
Laughs.
Tears.
Experiences.
Heartaches.
Joys.
Loves.
Prayers.

Today marks her 100th day. Although she often does not remember me at first glance, she eventually realizes who I am. One thing that is striking to me is that she always connects with my voice. When I call her Gram Clock, she knows it's me, her youngest granddaughter.It's odd that on this, her 100th day, it really does not matter that she doesn't recognize me: she has worked her way through this world and is prepared for the next. She may not always know me, or others that she once knew, but ONE that she always knows is HIM. She still knows HIM because HE was always there with her. HE was included. She made the choice to walk with HIM, to follow HIM. Not only is she still aware of HIM, but also of HIS WILL. She told me a few months ago that she had never planned to live this long but that this life is what HE had planned for her. She hears HIS voice and knows that HE is near.

Auntie's Little Helper (don't mind the bed head)

This is very interesting...and yet, confusing.

Are you sure about this thing?

I could really get into this...

Yep, homework isn't so bad with a good study buddy.

studying in bed should NEVER be trusted.

One of my continuing goals is to learn more and more about taking decent pictures. While this goal is often sidelined in lieu of studying, I do sneak in a blip here or there to further my progress. Today I was browsing and found this tutorial. I know a lot of people advise getting to know your camera but this girl broke it down in a way that was short enough to grasp but detailed enough to get something out of it.
Now...back to the homework!

A Decade Down.

Upon turning 25, the loveliest of best friends reminded me, that how-cow-how-did-this-happen?, but, we had been friends for nearly 10 years, a decade! For some reason this had not crossed my mind, at all, until she brought it how. How was that possible? How had I let 10 years fly by, unnoticed? Also, I was totally overwhelmed by what a blessing this friendship has been. How comforting is it to look someone in the eye who has also looked back at you in your 17 year-old-eyes (is anyone in there???), 21 year-old eyes (umm, you did what?!?!?! and are you sure that was a good idea?) and now today (gosh you're old!), is still right there with you? What changes have taken place over those 10 years? I started thinking about how we both had changes, how our families had grown close, how our geographical locations had changed, our daily lives have changed, our means of communication had changed, the lessons that we have learned, the lectures we've given one another, the issues that we have mulled over and bounced off one another. What a journey. Like a ribbon delicately woven through the path of life to create a strong, protective, safety net.

St. John of the Cross:

"Wisdom enters through love, silence, and mortification. It is great wisdom to know how to be silent and to look at neither the remarks, nor the deeds, nor the lives of others."

I found this on a blog during Lent. I felt like it pertained to me and what I am striving to do, especially now, when nursing classes seem more competitive than ever. It is so great to take the wisdom of a life that has gone before and know that at some moment, that person, felt the exact same way that you feel at this moment.